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The First Stage of Mourning: Denial and Inability to Confront Reality

  • 17 December 2025

The First Stage of Mourning: Denial and Inability to Confront Reality

The losses we encounter in our lives constitute one of the most challenging experiences. In this process, the mourning process includes stages for individuals to accept and reorganize their losses. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Loss, death, and mourning are an inseparable part of life." In this context, the first stage of the mourning process, denial, is a powerful emotional response that many individuals experience.

Definition of Denial and Its Psychological Foundations

Denial can be defined as a way for an individual to reject reality. In psychology, this term refers to situations where the acceptance of a difficult loss cannot be achieved. For example, the state of denial experienced after the loss of a loved one includes thoughts of "This cannot be, this is not real." Research shows that this emotional mechanism serves to help individuals maintain their emotional balance. Denial acts as a protective mechanism against the tumultuous nature of the situation.

Relationship Between Denial and Loss

Losses can leave deep scars on individuals. In this process, denial may lead a person to suppress the emotions they should be feeling. Denial in the death of a lost family member, friend, or colleague can make it challenging to accept this loss. Denial after a loss can create long-term effects on an individual's emotional and physical health. For example, in situations like divorce, job loss, or the death of a friend, individuals may struggle to accept the reality of the loss.

Symptoms of Denial

Symptoms of denial can vary. Individuals may have difficulty accepting the reality of the loss at this stage. These symptoms may include:

  • Emotional disconnection or numbness.
  • Disruption of daily life activities.
  • Intense replaying of thoughts related to the lost person.
  • Disbelief or disappointment towards their own reality.

Long-Term Effects of Denial

While denial may initially protect an individual, it can lead to various emotional and physical problems in the long term. Experts warn that remaining in a state of constant denial can lead to the development of depression, anxiety, and other psychological disorders over time. Additionally, if individuals cannot overcome this phase, they may lose their social skills, face problems in their relationships, and feel lonely. Therefore, seeking professional help at this stage is crucial.

Ways to Cope with Denial

There are several ways to overcome the denial process. The steps to be taken in this process can allow for the processing of emotions:

  1. Confronting Emotions: Accepting the emotions experienced after a loss is an important part of the mourning process. When you feel bad, you should embrace and accept these emotions instead of suppressing them.
  2. Seeking Support: Seeking professional support from family members, friends, or others can help in coping with losses. A supportive environment helps individuals process their loss more healthily.
  3. Writing Therapy: Putting your emotions into writing can help you express your inner thoughts and feelings more clearly. This method allows individuals to organize their thoughts.
  4. Using Media and Art: Creative outlets like art or music can be a good way to express your emotions. Such activities can alleviate an individual's emotional burden.

Conclusion

The denial, as the first stage of the mourning process, symbolizes an individual's difficulty in confronting their losses. While this stage serves as a temporary protective mechanism, it allows for an important step towards acceptance and healing over time. The pain of loss can be challenging, but seeking support during this process and developing healthy coping methods play a critical role in preserving individuals' emotional well-being.